Marching for Our Wives, Sisters, Daughters — and Our Country

I’m not an activist. The last time I joined a protest march was 1977, when Philadelphia General Hospital was closing. But for reasons both personal and political, I took part in the Women’s March on January 20.

It was a sunny though windy day. The 8:53 train was already packed arriving at Woodcrest, and seats were hard to come by. A young woman got up to offer me hers. When I declined (being an accomplished, proud straphanger from New York City), she took me by the arm and walked me to a seat at the end of the car. I sat down and asked the lady next to me, “Do I really look that frail?” “No,” she said, “you just look like an 88-year-old man.” Oh yeah? I thought, where did you get that? But then, one year wasn’t worth arguing about.

From the end stop at 16th and Locust we walked to Logan Circle, wondering where we would be stopped and searched for forbidden items. (We’d read that security measures would be in place.) But we weren’t stopped or searched.

The only visible police presence at that time was a helicopter circling at a discreet altitude. It was only when the march began that I saw police at ground level, leaning against the barricades along the side of the Parkway; they didn’t seem to expect trouble, and there wasn’t any. One officer in particular caught my eye, because he was wearing a thickly padded shirt with the words Counter-Terrorism Unit on the back. He may have wondered why he was there.

We strolled leisurely to Eakins Oval, listening to spirited conversation all around us, much laughter, and occasional anti-Trump chanting. There were posters galore, the best of which cannot be shown in The Chronicle because of their imaginative text and equally imaginative graphics.

Pussy hats were in evidence everywhere. Their range of color and knit pattern took me by surprise because I’d only seen plain pink ones last year. Of even greater interest to me was the presence of so many men. Constituting about five percent of the total of 50,000 (by my estimate, making about 2,500), a number were wheeling or carrying children—who also wore pussy hats. The Inquirer’s lengthy report on the march (q.v.) made no mention of the men, so I wrote to the editor, but my letter was not published.

Total strangers took pictures of Maggie and me, though I don’t know what it was about us that interested them. Finally, Natalie Pompilio from A.P. interviewed us, later reporting:

Retirees Herb and Maggie Heineman, ages 87 and 81 respectively, took careful steps as they inched closer to the stage set up in front of the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Herb Heineman, a naturalized citizen from Germany who now lives in Lumberton, New Jersey, cut off a reporter [Pompilio] who asked if he saw any comparisons between Donald Trump in the U.S. in 2018 and Germany from early in the 20th century.

“Don’t even finish it,” he said, shaking his head. “This [I’m sure I said That] is not the kind of country I want to live in.”

At the end of the interview we were a long walk from the nearest Porta Potty, so we didn’t stay for the speeches.

MEMORY, LONG TERM AND SHORT

Whatever happened to that brash 13-year-old
     who shamelessly threw her arms around my neck
     and locked the gaze of her hazel eyes on mine?

Whatever happened to that 14-year-old in the Juliet cap,
     whom I sought so eagerly when the curtain parted
     at the end of the worship service?

Whatever happened to the girl whose cheek I kissed,
     leaning out the window in that precious last second
     before the train began to move
    — a kiss that would sustain me for months to come?

We were children, uprooted from parental home
     by persecution and war,
     deposited in a strange country where people spoke
     a strange language,
     and after five loveless years we had found each other.

But postwar reunion with parents, who had been denied
     bearing witness to their child’s flowering,
     was just as disruptive as the original parting.

Preoccupied with memories of suffering
     they had barely survived,
     they had little patience with my romantic awakening,
     did not rejoice with me, did not allow my adolescence
     to run its natural, happy course.

Fearful and suspicious, they maligned, blocked, warned,
     and thereby sullied our parent-child relationship.
     What a shame they didn’t simply let youth’s fancy
     bloom and wither of its own accord.

Seventy years later — years of maturity,
     settled with life partner, children, grandchildren —
     she vividly remembers that lush oasis
     in the desolate landscape of our childhood.

But the present eludes her.
     She forgets my answer
     to the question she asked just minutes ago,
     even forgets that she asked.

So she asks again,
     and asks again,
     and forgets both answer and question each time.

That’s what happened to her.
     She did not choose what to remember
     and what to forget;
     her illness mercifully chose for her.

Mercifully, because forgotten questions can be repeated,
     over and over until remembered,
     but forgotten memories of youth are lost forever.

    

WORDS FOR A SACRED PLACE

I look, I listen.
I feel an indefinable presence.
In the majestic woods, in whose embrace this sacred place is nestled,
I feel it,
though my eyes see only trees and the sky above.
In the ground on which we stand, so full of life and the remains of life deceased,
I feel it,
though my ears hear only the occasional birdcall and the random rustle of leaves.
I sense a hand beckoning and a voice softly saying,
“If you are moved by what you’ve felt here,
then, in your good time, come to me, add your voice to mine,
so that together we may afford the same experience to those you’ve left behind.”

Meditation Garden, a place for quiet and contemplation in the woods at Medford Leas, underwent extensive reconstruction in the summer of 2013. These lines were written for its dedication on November 7 of that year.

A MOST PRECIOUS GIFT

The love of a friend is unlike any other,
Unlike husband for wife, unlike sister for brother.

It does not compete, it does not displace,
But claims in your heart its select, reserved space.

It’s not rooted in task, in advancement, or duty,
It’s a bond, pure and simple, and there lies its beauty.

It is honest, sincere, has no need for disguise.
Its embrace is for all, the naïve and the wise.

It is food for the intellect, food for the soul,
It nurtures the spirit and renders it whole.

Should you be despondent or feel cast adrift
Think of a true friend and your spirits will lift

…Indeed,

The love of a friend is a most precious gift.