{"id":251,"date":"2016-09-05T09:50:53","date_gmt":"2016-09-05T13:50:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.herbheineman.com\/?page_id=251"},"modified":"2024-07-25T16:51:15","modified_gmt":"2024-07-25T20:51:15","slug":"chapter-19","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/edensgarden\/chapter-19\/","title":{"rendered":"Chapter 19: Parents and Children"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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PART II<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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As much as good fortune blessed Eden by rescuing her a second time, it spared Josh the ordeal of being a helpless bystander. By the time the Rabins returned from Europe, her crisis was a thing of the past. What mattered now was that in ten days he\u2019d leave for Ithaca.<\/p>

Eden had been waiting for the call. She wasted no time on greetings. \u201cCan I come over?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cIf you don\u2019t mind total chaos,\u201d Debbie answered.<\/p>

Despite the August heat she ran most of the way. The door was open and she burst in without bothering to ring. \u201cHello!\u201d she shouted. \u201cWelcome to the U.S. of A.\u201d<\/p>

Esther came out to meet her and called the rest of the family. \u201cExcuse us, Edie, we\u2019re not ready for a formal reception. Just look at me.\u201d She pointed to her disheveled self.<\/p>

Debbie and Max appeared next. Eden looked expectantly from one doorway to another.<\/p>

\u201cWhere\u2019s Josh?\u201d No answer. She was panicked. \u201cDidn\u2019t he come back with you?\u201d<\/p>

The three Rabin faces remained deadpan. \u201cI thought you raced over here to see us.\u201d<\/em> Eden was struck dumb, she didn\u2019t know if Max was serious or joking. Esther couldn\u2019t keep it up.<\/p>

\u201cPoor girl! And Max, how cruel of you.\u201d They all burst into laughter, and at that moment Josh appeared in the living-room doorway, striking a pose. \u201cTa-da!\u201d<\/p>

Eden walked slowly over to him, looked into his face, and fell into his arms shamelessly. Let them watch all they want. But \u201cthey,\u201d their practical joke played, did not embarrass her further. There was unpacking to be done and plans to be made for eating.<\/p>

\u201cIt\u2019s so good to see you,\u201d they said in unison. For more than a minute they just stood, arms around each other. \u201cAnd you\u2019ll be gone again in no time.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cMore than a week. We\u2019ll have time.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cBut you have to shop for clothes, soap, washcloths, and all that stuff. Is your mom sewing nametags in your undershirts? Do you have a flashlight? A canteen?\u201d She was laughing to avoid crying. \u201cI should get out of the way.\u201d She wiped her eyes. \u201cYou\u2019ve got lots to do. Will you call me in the morning? I have to tell you about my penicillin reaction.\u201d<\/p>

~~~~~~~~~~<\/p>

Karen phoned. \u201cEsther, have you finished moving back in?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cOh, how I wish. There\u2019s so much to do. Food, laundry, cleaning, people wanting to know every last detail about our trip. I wouldn\u2019t mind if we weren\u2019t also getting Josh ready. But I\u2019m glad you called. You\u2019re going to get some fallout from Josh\u2019s leaving.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cThat\u2019s the very reason I called. The way Edie was counting the days, and the way she flew over there. . .\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI hope you\u2019re not upset,\u201d Esther said. \u201cThey\u2019re both having such a good time.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cBut they\u2019re so young, especially Edie. We shouldn\u2019t just stand by.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cSo you suggest a parents\u2019 conference?\u201d Esther asked, thankful that Karen couldn\u2019t see the laughter in her eyes. \u201cTell you what, let\u2019s play bridge, the four of us. It\u2019s been a while. We\u2019ll come to your house and Edie can come here. That way we\u2019ll be free to talk.\u201d<\/p>

Josh and Eden were on the phone in no time. \u201cCan\u2019t I see you before then?\u201d she pleaded.<\/p>

\u201cI\u2019ll call you as soon as I know when we\u2019re going shopping. We also have to make a trip to New York to see my grandparents. That\u2019ll take a whole day.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cCan\u2019t you do that on the way up? . . . Oh I\u2019m so sorry,\u201d she caught herself before he could answer. \u201cI have no business making suggestions like that.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI like your suggestion. But Dad\u2019s already vetoed it. New York City isn\u2019t really on the way. Besides, we\u2019d have to spend the night, and they don\u2019t have enough room for all of us.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cAt least we\u2019ll have Sunday.\u201d<\/p>

~~~~~~~~~~<\/p>

The Rabins were two thousand points ahead. \u201cLet\u2019s talk, it\u2019s more fun,\u201d Alan said.<\/p>

After Karen had served dessert, he turned to Max. \u201cSo \u2015 Josh\u2019s off to college this week.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cDay after tomorrow,\u201d Max answered. \u201cI remember when we first came to Philly. His Bar Mitzvah. His first day at Central. His first game on the school team, heading the ball with his nose instead of his forehead. It seems so long ago. Then that trip on the Blue Ridge Parkway. . . . It\u2019s going to be quiet without him.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWe\u2019ll all miss him, but Edie especially.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYes,\u201d Esther said. \u201cI guess the reason we\u2019re here tonight is to talk about them, isn\u2019t it?\u201d She turned to Karen. \u201cKaren, it was your idea. You were worried. I can understand that. Edie\u2019s quite a bit younger.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cShe\u2019s also the girl,\u201d<\/em> said Max.<\/p>

\u201cYou\u2019re not suggesting a double standard, are you?\u201d Karen was clearly offended. The others felt uncomfortable, but Max escaped gracefully.<\/p>

\u201cI\u2019m sure none of us around this table believe in a double standard. But I wouldn\u2019t be surprised if we sometimes act that way without thinking.\u201d<\/p>

Esther thought this diversion was a waste of time. \u201cLook, we\u2019ve all been watching this, so let\u2019s put our feelings on the table. I can tell you, speaking for myself, I think it\u2019s OK. More than OK. They look happy. I\u2019m very simple-minded about things like that. Two people have found happiness \u2015 however trite that sounds \u2015 and it\u2019s cost nobody anything. Why fight it?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cBut those things don\u2019t last,\u201d Alan said. \u201cThey break up and then they\u2019re miserable.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cSo,\u201d Esther shot back, \u201cdo you want to do the breaking up for<\/em> them? Will they be any less miserable that way? I\u2019ll tell you something: Not only will they be more<\/em> miserable, but they\u2019ll resent us, maybe for the rest of their lives. I say let nature take its course.\u201d<\/p>

Max suddenly looked thoughtful. \u201cI wonder if that trip last fall had something to do with all this. It was as if he\u2019d had some kind of revelation. Didn\u2019t it look that way to you, Esther?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cThat\u2019s exactly what it looked like. I\u2019ve never pried into it. I hoped he\u2019d say something, but he hasn\u2019t. He seemed to grow up all of a sudden, become more serious and considerate.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cThey started getting interested in each other about that time,\u201d Max said.<\/p>

\u201cI just thought of something else,\u201d Karen said. \u201cShe came in one day, full of enthusiasm over a handful of leaves, as if it were the first time she\u2019d ever noticed the fall colors.\u201d<\/p>

Max\u2019s face lit up. \u201cYes, she brought them over to the sukkah. She can\u2019t have known what was going on in Josh\u2019s mind, I\u2019m sure of that. So they came up with their little discoveries independently. Quite a coincidence. Obviously made for each other.\u201d He spread his hands.<\/p>

\u201cFall Colors Spawn Love.<\/em> What a title!\u201d Alan said.<\/p>

\u201cWe don\u2019t know what\u2019s cause and what\u2019s effect, but\u2014\u201d Esther began, but Max broke in.<\/p>

\u201cYou\u2019re right! It could be, Love Causes Fall Colors.\u201d<\/em><\/p>

\u201cOh, stop it already!\u201d Esther sounded exasperated. \u201cWhat I mean is, who cares really? Now we have these two, and at this very moment they\u2019re\u2014\u201d<\/p>

\u201c\u2014discussing fall colors, no doubt,\u201d Alan finished. Esther threw up her hands.<\/p>

\u201cAll right,\u201d Karen joined in again. \u201cWhat do we think they are<\/em> doing?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cNothing dangerous, I\u2019ll vouch,\u201d Esther said, grateful for Karen\u2019s rescue. \u201cKids this age do things. If they don\u2019t, either they\u2019re retarded or they\u2019ve been brought up in a straitjacket. They\u2019re both smart. They know when to stop. I wouldn\u2019t think of lecturing them.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cDo you think it could be platonic?\u201d Karen asked.<\/p>

\u201cNo,\u201d Max said. \u201cYou should\u2019ve seen the way they fell on each other when Edie came over the other day. Still, I have a feeling this thing between them is mostly spiritual, as if they\u2019d discovered soulmates in each other. Which doesn\u2019t mean they won\u2019t get physical, as young people are apt to do. But I agree with Esther, they won\u2019t let it get out of hand.\u201d<\/p>

Alan looked at him with amusement. \u201cYou have hard data to support that conclusion?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cNo, just intuition,\u201d Max said with a self-deprecating laugh.<\/p>

\u201cI didn\u2019t know men had intuition,\u201d Karen said.<\/p>

Max stared at her. \u201cA double standard? You?<\/em> No, I didn\u2019t hear that.\u201d He covered his ears.<\/p>

\u201cTouch\u00e9,\u201d Karen said. \u201cYou\u2019re so right about what we do without thinking.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cBack on the subject \u2015 once more,\u201d Esther said. This time she was faking exasperation. \u201cI say rejoice with them. Edie\u2019s a lovely girl and Josh is lucky she\u2019s his friend. I\u2019m not the least bit afraid that anything bad will come of it. That\u2019s my opinion.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI agree,\u201d Max said. \u201cIf I don\u2019t have intuition, at least I can coattail on my wife\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>

Karen made a face. \u201cYou\u2019ve made your point, Max. OK? Now seriously, what worries me is not sex, heartbreak, or any of that stuff. I\u2019ll go along with not meddling on that level. But I am afraid of them getting so serious, they\u2019ll be impatient to get married. Even if they wait till Josh graduates from college, she\u2019ll still only be twenty.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with being married in college, or in grad school?\u201d Alan asked his wife.<\/p>

\u201cMarried is OK. But then come the children, and \u2018poof\u2019 goes the career.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWe didn\u2019t have children right away,\u201d he said.<\/p>

\u201cNo, not right away,\u201d Karen answered in a tone that discouraged further comment.<\/p>

\u201cThat\u2019s a long time off, Karen,\u201d Esther said quietly, \u201cand I\u2019m sure if and when they face that decision they\u2019ll do what\u2019s right for them.\u201d<\/p>

Somewhat less gently Alan said, \u201cWe can\u2019t do it for them, and we shouldn\u2019t even try. Besides, who knows what her condition will be five years from now? She may go into heart failure, she may be advised against pregnancy, she may need valve surgery. Who knows?\u201d<\/p>

Karen had gone into the kitchen. She stayed out several minutes, prompting questioning looks from Esther and Max. When she returned she was blowing her nose.<\/p>

\u201cWe\u2019re speculating,\u201d Max said. \u201cFor all we know, in three months they\u2019ll have forgotten all about each other.\u201d No one believed him. \u201cThey also aren\u2019t of the same faith.\u201d<\/p>

Esther sighed. \u201cIf things ever get to where that\u2019s an issue,\u201d she said, \u201cI can only hope that we, the parents, are ready to support them. Let\u2019s play another rubber.\u201d<\/p>

~~~~~~~~~~<\/p>

Large puddles, left by the thunderstorm just past, forced Eden and Josh to walk single file. Once in the park, they had no streetlights to guide their steps. Now they walked on twigs and rocks, with mud between. They joined hands and lifted their faces to catch the scent of the foliage and the intermittent showers of rainwater dislodged by the breeze. Neither spoke, as if agreed that conversation would have been an intrusion on their communion with nature.<\/p>

They turned onto a darker side path. As their eyes adjusted, they made out the silhouettes of treetops against the overcast sky, which, glowed softly from reflected city lights.<\/p>

\u201cLight pollution isn\u2019t all bad.\u201d Josh broke the silence. \u201cIf it weren\u2019t for that, we wouldn\u2019t be able to see two feet in front of us.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWouldn\u2019t bother me one bit,\u201d Eden answered. \u201cDid you ever go on a trust walk?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cCamp stuff. Everybody forms a chain and closes their eyes. Then you walk, holding on to each other\u2019s hands. Only the leader sees where he\u2019s going; the rest have to trust him.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cSounds simple. Obviously the leader doesn\u2019t go off a cliff, so why would the rest?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYes, it sounds simple, but it gets spooky. If you\u2019re on the side of a mountain or you hear water, it\u2019s downright scary. Remember, you\u2019re a blind person following another blind person, and you\u2019re responsible for the one behind you. The farther back you are the spookier it gets.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cThey didn\u2019t do that at any of the camps I went to. Probably didn\u2019t trust anybody.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI\u2019m doing it right now. My eyes are closed.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cAre you trusting me?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYes, Josh, I trust you. Lead me somewhere.\u201d<\/p>

A few yards farther he turned into a trail. \u201cAre you still trusting?\u201d he asked.<\/p>

\u201cYes. I think we\u2019re off the path. The ground feels rougher than before. Am I right?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYou\u2019re right. OK if we keep going? It gets rougher still.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYes, go as far as you want. I\u2019ll follow.\u201d<\/p>

It took almost five minutes to cover the next hundred feet, because in the woods Josh\u2019s vision was not much better than Eden\u2019s. Then the moon appeared in a gap between the clouds. Eden was unaware of this and was alarmed by his sudden stop.<\/p>

\u201cIs something wrong, Josh? Did you hear something?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cDon\u2019t open your eyes, but the moon just came out and I had to stop to look. It\u2019s a real work of art. The clouds part like a curtain, and there\u2019s the lead actor in full splendor.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cIt\u2019s hard not to look. Is it full, half, or what?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cHalf. Do you remember that night, Edie? The first time we ever walked together?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI couldn\u2019t forget it if I wanted to. And I don\u2019t ever want to. May I say something?\u201d<\/p>

He paused, feeling the palpitations of his heart. \u201cSpeak, Edie. I\u2019m listening.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cWhen I got home that night I was supposed to study. But I turned off the light and stared at the moon. It hypnotized me. I stared and stared, and I had a vision of the moon changing into your face. I would have sat there all night if Mom hadn\u2019t come and checked on me. I knew then that I wanted to see you again. I mean in a dating situation.\u201d<\/p>

Josh turned and reached for her other hand. \u201cOpen your eyes, Edie, and look at me. You don\u2019t need to find my face in the moon. It\u2019s right here on earth. The way I feel this moment, I wish I didn\u2019t have to go. But two days from now I won\u2019t be here. My life is changing. For all I know, I may never live in my parents\u2019 home again. After college there could be graduate school, God knows where, or a job someplace. Everything is so uncertain. Sometimes I have such doubts about going to Cornell. I could have gotten a perfectly good education closer to home. Suppose you have another reaction to some medication, I\u2019d want to be here.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cInside I feel the same way, but I also know that decision was right. After we talked about it that time, I asked myself, who am I to advise you? Then I realized that if I, who didn\u2019t want you to go, feel so strongly that you should, then anyone without my feelings would surely tell you the same, so it must be right. So please, Josh, please don\u2019t look back now.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYou are amazing. How can anyone be so selfless?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cIt\u2019s not selflessness. What\u2019s best for you makes me the happiest. So it\u2019s me I\u2019m looking out for. If I can feel I\u2019ve done the right thing, that\u2019ll keep me going when I miss you most. And don\u2019t worry about my allergy. I\u2019m on sulfa now and I\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cEdie,\u201d Josh said, hesitating, \u201cwe\u2019ve never come right out and said how we feel\u2014\u201d<\/p>

\u201cDon\u2019t,\u201d she stopped him, in a voice barely above a whisper. \u201cNo magic words. If we can\u2019t read each other without them, they aren\u2019t worth saying anyway.\u201d<\/p>

He pulled her a little toward him. \u201cThere\u2019s a physical language too. We\u2019ve never done anything in private that we haven\u2019t been willing for all to see.\u201d<\/p>

She looked into his eyes without speaking. \u201cPart of me wants very much to make love to you,\u201d he went on, \u201cbut something holds me back. As though it would cheapen our friendship. We have something so special, I want to keep it \u2015 oh, I guess \u2018pure\u2019 is as good a word as any. Whatever it is, it has to do with responding the same way to things of beauty. Remember how we marveled together at the moon and the stars, the spider on its invisible thread, the fall colors? With you I feel comfortable sharing thoughts that would embarrass me with anyone else. I don\u2019t want anything to distract from that.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cI wish physical expression didn\u2019t have to distract from the spiritual,\u201d she said. \u201cOne should add to the other. But it\u2019s too soon, especially for me. I\u2019m so glad you\u2019re not pushing it, because I just don\u2019t know whether I could resist. Do you understand what I\u2019m saying?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cHow could I not? It seems that every time we talk there\u2019s something new for me to marvel at. Here we are, both wanting to cross that line and both valuing our friendship so much that we\u2019re agreeing not to. How often does it happen that two people can make each other feel good by not<\/em> making love? What we have is magic, do you know that, Edie?\u201d<\/p>

\u201cYes, magic,\u201d she said quietly. For a while the rustle of leaves was the only sound. \u201cWe won\u2019t be seeing each other for months. I want to remember the feel of your heart beating.\u201d<\/p>

She put her right hand on his chest and focused her attention until she thought she could feel beat. Not moving, she allowed the sensation to flood through her until she was saturated.<\/p>

\u201cNow feel mine,\u201d she said softly. Slowly pulling his right hand toward her, she placed her left breast in his palm, covered his hand with hers, and pressed. In a voice he barely recognized as his own, he murmured, \u201cHow I wish I could touch it and make it well.\u201d<\/p>

For a full minute they stood in that position before they dropped their hands. Then, closing their eyes on expressions too eloquent for words, they embraced as never before, sought each other\u2019s mouth, and for the first time drank of each other.<\/p>

\u201cOh my God,\u201d he said as they stepped back. He looked at her and closed his eyes again. \u201cThank goodness the ground is sopping wet. Else, I don\u2019t know where this would end.\u201d<\/p>

\u201cCome, Josh, take me straight home, and let\u2019s not speak a single word more.\u201d<\/p>

She took his left hand in her right, squeezed so tight that it hurt, and pulled him along.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t

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<< Chapter 18<\/a><\/div>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Chapter 20 >><\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

PART II As much as good fortune blessed Eden by rescuing her a second time, it spared Josh the ordeal of being a helpless bystander. By the time the Rabins returned from Europe, her crisis was a thing of the past. What mattered now was that in ten days he\u2019d leave for Ithaca. Eden had […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":21,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-251","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/251","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=251"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/251\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":794,"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/251\/revisions\/794"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/21"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herbheineman.com\/Eden\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=251"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}